I recently visited a wedding and as I witnessed the wedding vows my thoughts drifted to a recent survey result that are as follows.
In the light of this survey I wonder what is going through the minds of the bride and the groom as they take their wedding vows
In the first Vow the groom says that their love has become strong and he promises his bride that he would provide everything that is required for the welfare, well being and happiness of the entire family.
What he actually means is He will provide her with all the dirty garments and clothes and of course the detergent to wash them with. As 76% of married men in India believe that not helping with Laundry at home still makes them a great role model for their children*
In the second vow the groom promises that he would forever remain committed in providing for her. He would keep loving her and be the source of courage and inspiration. Perhaps what he means is that he will make sure that she never runs out of dirty laundry and the bride interprets it as : if she is working, she will be doing two jobs for the rest of her life one at the office and the other at home. As 78% of girls in India agree that they should learn Laundry as they will have to do it when they grow up*
In the third vow he promises to his would be wife and prays to god that they may be blessed with wealth and prosperity and have the means to provide for their kids and their well being.What he really means is that when they have children they will also contribute to the dirty laundry and he on his part will ensure that he provides for the detergent so that his wife can continue to wash the enhanced dirty laundry contributed by the kids uninterrupted. As a large number of men believe that Laundry is a womens job and 81% of married men in India agree that their daughters must learn household chores
By this time of life the wife begins to believe that laundry is a women’s responsibility. As large number of Indian girls feel (or have realized), that there exists an inequality at home, between men and women as many as 78% of girls in India agree that they should learn Laundry as they will have to do it when they grow up
In the fourth vow he thanks his wife for bringing in love ,joy, happiness and auspiciousness to his life and his family . Perhaps what he is thinking is that she is bringing the promise of washing his dirty laundry and that of his kids for the rest of her life.To some extent even the bride begins to think along similar lines. Now with children coming into the picture even their opinion matters and 2 out of every 3 children think that washing clothes is a mothers job so poor mother is innundated with a never ending load of dirty clothes to wash.
In the fifth vow the groom and the bride pray to goddess Lakshmi the goddess of wealth to bestow upon them wealth and prosperity. Perhaps what he is thinking is that she may bestow upon them enough boxes of detergents so that the wife can wash all the dirty laundry of their future household.
In the sixth vow the groom promises his bride that he would always provide her with utmost happiness. He would provide her with joy and peace and let her enjoy her time peacefully undisturbed. Perhaps he is thinking of watching TV and let her wash the laundry undisturbed and perhaps even his children would have started getting into the process of adding to all the dirty laundry at home. 65% of married men in India agree that their children replicate their behavior at home.
In the seventh vow the groom tells his bride that their relationship is firm and from now on “She is His forever and He is hers” and together they would live happily forever.
Perhaps what he means is that from now on she would continue to take care of his dirty laundry and on his part he would continue to provide the dirty laundry for the rest of his life. This is only the affirmation of the belief of 78% of girls in India who agree that they should learn Laundry as they will have to do it when they grow up
However today when marriages and households are based on equality then why is the burden of laundry thrust upon the women alone. It time to #ShareTheLoad its time to ponder and break this myth and liberate the modern woman from the burden of doing the laundry alone. Its time for the men to be man enough and be equal participant in doing household chores specially laundry.They could start by dedicating one day of the week as the Laundry day where all the members of the family get together and do the laundry together .This would help not only the women of the household but also give our society balanced individuals who know how to share the load and stand for each other.As children emulate their parents it would be a great step towards molding them to be responsible citizens of the society .In short its about being man enough to take responsibility of your laundry
“I am joining the Ariel #ShareTheLoad campaign at BlogAdda and blogging about the prejudice related to household chores being passed on to the next generation.”